A Not-So-Friendly Guide to Group Photos

So I was zoomin’ with some friends the other night, and I wanted to take a picture to prove to the world that I still have friends (I swear I do). I asked them to smile, snapped the picture, then promptly uploaded it to my Insta story, tagging each of my friends. As they each got the notification, a little ding echoing through the speakers, one friend says, “Oh, Maria tagged me in a photo. Was it cute at least?” 

At this point, I gasped dramatically, because of course, it was freaking cute. What kind of person puts a less-than-cute picture of their friends up on social media? The answer: a lot of people, apparently. So we’re going to have a quick chat about some group photo etiquette.

There is one rule: Make sure everyone looks good.

It should go without saying, but if you caught a friend mid-word or someone’s eyes are closed, try to pick a different picture. It doesn’t matter if seven out of eight people look fantastic, you can’t post a picture where the eighth person is a blurry mess. 

You need to find the median image. Now, this does require some sacrifice, as there may be pictures where other people (or even yourself) look better, but you need to find the shot where the group looks the best collectively. You’re putting all that good karma out there in the world, and good friends will return the favour. And if there isn’t a median image? Then don’t post the picture. 

I will admit, there are some circumstances to which there are exceptions. 

If there is a picture that you really want to post, and you think maybe your friend doesn’t look all that bad, there’s a really simple way to check: ask them. “Hey, which picture do you like best?” or “Hey, would you be cool with me posting this?” If they say yes, then great! Get those likes. If they say no, well, you’re shit out of luck because that means that picture is off-limits.

But, what if there’s a picture that you look amazing in, the absolute best you’ve ever looked, but your friend looks terrible, and they tell you not to post it? Learn photoshop.

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